When I started to write this week, I was going to write about the new recipes I'm obsessed with. Perhaps in another post I will. But I had something heavy on my heart this week and I figured I started this blog to be honest and even if no body reads this, it feels therapeutic to write about it.
How many of you have children? How many of you still have your friends that you had pre-pregnancy? When I say 'have' I mean, they still call, text, try to hang out? If you answered with any number to the second question, you win. What I realized this week is that the word 'friends' is a fluid word, representing those that God has in your life during certain seasons. Looking back at all the friends I've had during my life, they all fit perfectly for the season I was in. Some have lasted through the seasons, others have faded away, some for good reason. However, the one season that made it challenging for any to really remain was my baby season, and again I emphasize the 'staying' part because that is the part where they text or check in and still want to hang. Now I'm not saying I have no friends, I know I do, however what I realized is that through this season in particular, there are less texts, almost no invites, and less chitchat. Which is a different pace then I was used to pre-baby season. I've tried to keep it up and for me it's hard when you don't feel like it's reciprocated and add a baby to it, then it doesn't seem worth it.
I recognize that the reason this plays out the way it does, is because people go through different stages of life then their friends. No stage of life someone is in is better than another, they are merely stages that can operate parallel to another, however taking you on different trajectories.
Out of our friends group we were the first to get married, one of the first to have kids, and for those reasons our life has taken us in a direction through a season that is different then our friends. And I understand that. I appreciate how we all enter different stages, that's what make people unique, I just sometimes wish that things didn't have to change because of it. I sometimes miss the way things were. But it's at no fault of anyone's the way things play out and friendships evolve.
Now, I didn't want this to be a sob post or a please feel sorry for me post, because like I said, I know I have friends. I simply wanted to share this because I know I can not be the only new Mom who lost their close friendships at the start of a time in your life when you felt unsure of what you were doing and needed a close friend the most. It won't be this way forever, like any other time in life, this is just a season. John and I chose to have a baby when we did, because we felt ready, God had placed the desire in our hearts and we never have second guessed it. Looking at my beautiful boy he is worth EVERYTHING and EVERY sacrifice I have had to make. Just know, these are seasons and friendships are fluid, they eb and flow through them.
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